“New Girl”: Man problems

Credit the minds of New Girl for following through on the briefly-introduced reincorporation of Nick and Schmidt’s idea machine from “Coming Out” and making an episode of it. The show didn’t deliver last season when Schmidt promised Nick he’d help him get over Jess by bunking up with him like the old college days. I’m over it, though. Season 4 has been strong enough and Zooey Deschanel completely perfect that the show hasn’t needed the antics from Nick and Schmidt that acted as stress-relieving getaways from last year’s failed relationship with Jess.

Nonetheless, Nick and Schmidt have found the magic again and it works in “Swuit.” But there’s friction. They’re not the same irresponsible, shit-shooting college roommates who almost invented the smart phone 15 years ago. Even so, their animosity is New Girl‘s gain. It’s the source of a lot of humor and invention, including the nightmare of the Think Harder Box and the hysterically confusing way the guys scream compliments at Jess.

The problem is that Nick is pretty much the same lazy guy from college, but Schmidt’s a responsible boss-type with a whipping stick. Though, as established in “Coming Out,” Schmidt only has the most positive intentions of metaphorically waking Nick up from a deep, deep slumber, which is slightly blamed on Kai. By the end of “Swuit,” she breaks up with Nick because he’s spending too much chasing pipe dreams with Schmidt, instead of sitting on a couch with her. Whether you liked her initially or not, she didn’t turn out to be the noblest rich girl ever. Worse, she reflects poorly on our almighty savior Tran, her grandfather.

Schmidt and Nick have two main ideas in “Swuit,” because we’re not counting bread beard. First, the swuit, which is a suit made completely from sweatsuit material. Then, there’s the perfect puppy pic, which is a camera built to keep a dog’s attention by dangling a treat from the lens. Both brilliant, utterly useless items that at least stray from anything to do with robots. So, Nick’s progressing.

With a pitch meeting with that QVC lady on Friday and a feud to sort out, Jess enters the fold as she often does. Don’t get me wrong: Deschanel has been a powerhouse this season, but sometimes her character is best as a moderator. Better yet, as someone who stirs the pot by telling each Nick and Schmidt their business partner is having man problems. So let up on him, OK?

Damn she’s good. What? (What?)

She’s messing with them, sure, but she knows a peaceful apartment equals a friendly Nick and Schmidt. On her end, she’s saving their ass by bringing the camera Nick forgot to the pitch, which they’re already blowing up, and poetically after spilling her coffee on her, interrupting a pleasant jingle she’s made up about it, the only thing she can wear is the swuit. And she said she’d never wear it.

When she shows up, the presentation is in disarray. Nick’s babbling, Schmidt’s unleashing the 7 S’s and the QVC lady is growing uninterested. Quick-witted as ever, Jess even comes up with a tagline for the swuit and gets them paid 10 grand to destroy it. More importantly, she’s let the hot air out of the room. Nick and Schmidt were taking it too seriously, so much so that they were bugging each other. Sometimes you just have to remind people that they didn’t invent the smart phone.

My favorite thing: I may not have an investment to make for Cece’s major college budget issues, but even if I did I couldn’t write the check because, like Winston and Coach, I don’t know her real name! Although, it had to have come up sometime when Cece got really into her Indian heritage and was going to get married.


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